The Biggest Relationship No No: Social Suicide

• You don’t party hard, or at all, on the weekends anymore: Sure your friends hit you up with various weekend plans, all of which involve some sort of alcoholic beverage. And even though the jungle juice party rocked the last two years, you just don’t really feel like going this year. Instead you and your lover would rather just stay in and have a movie night! Yes! After all you have been dying to see 27 Dresses and popsecret popcorn is your favorite.
• You have no idea what’s going on in your friend’s lives: Megan banged Rob last weekend and Rob’s ex walked in on it? WHAT!? Nicole just got into law school for the fall and Danielle is failing linear equations so she’s decided to put in a little ‘extra credit’?! Huh? Yes, this all happened and you have no idea. You haven’t bothered asking any of your friends how they are doing, when you see them for those brief interludes your mind is totally occupied with the happenings in your life. Seriously what will you wear to dinner tonight? And should you make the reservation for 7 or 8? You stop putting the time and work into your friendships because at this point you’ve fallen so far behind it would be impossible to catch up.
• All your recent facebook pictures are photos of just the two of you: Your profile picture is so freaking adorable! Why it’s a photo of the two of you kissing! As if everyone on Facebook wasn’t dying to see that! Your latest album- 75 photos of the two of you kayaking or eating hot dogs at the football game. The last time you appeared in a friend’s photo you had blonde hair and were likely ten pounds skinner. Meanwhile your best friend just uploaded photos from Ryan’s party last weekend, and strangely you weren’t in any of them…
• You’ve put on a few pounds: You used to love going to the gym after class, but you just haven’t made the time for it anymore. And even though you haven’t been drinking nearly as much- you’re looking a little heavier. This happens too frequently when people have been dating for a while. You even started slacking on shaving and started wearing sweat pants on a daily basis. But you can do these things because you’re in a committed relationship. If this is you, take a second to consider the possibility of a breakup- okay now do you think that hot guy in your econ class has taken a second glance at you all semester?
• You sleep alone less than 2 days a week: No, you two don’t live together yet, but you might as well. No explanations necessary – you’re balls are inside her purse if you were curious.
• The phone calls & texts become scarcer until they stop entirely: You actually notice that the girls didn’t invite you to pregame on Friday night. And strangely you didn’t get asked about the GirlTalk concert either. When you do see your friends their faces are less welcoming and the voice they usually reserve for obnoxious freshman is full force. Maybe they are just having a bad day? No you idiot- they think you suck. And truthfully you do suck.
• You take all the same classes: Everybody changes majors in college, it’s like a rite of passage, but usually it happens because you suddenly realized you hate Microbiology and would rather do Social Work. When you decide to change your future plans for someone you’re dating, you’re plain stupid. Sure take the occasional gen ed. together, but follow the career path that’s right for you, not for the both of you.

So I leave you with one final piece of advice. Wake up and realize your friends become your family and you need them to function normally. Once you burn those bridges don’t cry to them when things don’t work out with your relationship because they won’t care, and quite frankly can you blame them?